Things Toumar has Written (Not WoW-Related)

[Toumar]

So here's a thread. From time to time, I'll post something I've written, either a poem, a short story, or an essay. I'm not placing any guidelines on it in terms of content - the first two things I intend to post are a poem that was inspired by a suicide at my school, and an essay about Christianity. I'll probably post short stories and such later.

Please, please, please, if you read any of them, GIVE FEEDBACK. I feel like an attention whore when I say "Hey, didja read this yet? Hey, didja read this yet?" all the time in Vent or our OOC channel, but I REALLY like getting people's opinions on my efforts. You can give feedback by posting in this thread, PMing me, or just telling me directly in-game or over Vent. But I really do enjoy getting input.

[Toumar]

((As I mentioned in the post above, this is a poem that I wrote in memory of a girl who committed suicide while I was a high school student. I did not know her personally, but the event shook a lot of people, and I couldn't help but channel the mood. Her name was Deanna.))

Deanna

Crimson is sorrow, weakness and pain.
Blood on her hands, drops fall like rain.
Black is her heart, beats slowing down,
Black is the gun that ran her aground.

Cold is the wind that whips at her friends,
Who offer their all just to see her again.
Hot are the tears that flow from their eyes,
As the family that lost her looks to the skies.

Bleak is the morning from which she first fled,
Lying forever asleep on her bed.
Though one tiny life is all that was lost,
No one can ever quite fathom its cost.

[Sunsinger]

I'm probably THE worst person to comment on this, since my strengths are prose and not poetry by a LONG shot - but I like it. It's not emo like most poems on the subject that I've read. Nice balance there Tou.

[Sael'thos Skyskinner]

toumar, didnt know you could write poetry like this. good job man =]

[Renisse]

Toumar...write me a poem!

[Toumar]

A poem for Reni:

There once was a fella named Scott,
Who really thought dolphins were hot,
He was kind of a tease,
but I gave him a squeeze,
And my problems were quickly forgot!

[Sunsinger]

*ROLLING*

[Sinfael Vanmoriel]

*laugh* I love that poem for Reni! Very nice--make sure he reads that.

Also, the poem about Deanna was very touching. You do have a skill for rhymes, and I'd love to see you write a sonnet or perhaps a lengthier poem that tells a story (like "The Mariner", only more interesting)!

[Toumar]

This is an essay I wrote last year. A few friends of mine in my church went around posting signs that said "Religion Kills" in response to a sermon they disagreed with. I understood what they were getting at, but I knew their efforts would be misunderstood. I kinda wrote this to show my view from both sides of the argument.

It's long, so I'm linking to it instead of posting it here. And yes, I know Xanga is lame. Shut up.


The Word 'Religion' is Too Big - by Andrew F.

[Aeiara Traselghan]

Wow. You're really good, Tou. I like your writing. I also agreed with everything in your essay, and think that you should write more stuff like that and get it published to some news site or newspaper. Freelance writing like that may not be steady pay, but it would be a good supplement to what you're already getting, if you're still into it. Something that you enjoy, that could get you some recognition! Or, you could just not listen to me, what do I know... xD

[Toumar]

M'kay. Another poem. And I want to preface it just a little: this is another poem that I wrote more as a result of channeling the mood of someone else than because of my own feelings. I don't want people to think I sit around and write depressing poetry all day.

My grandfather on my mother's side took sick about three years ago. He recovered, but there was a time when it looked like there was a good chance he wouldn't. Somewhere at the low point of his condition, my mom kind of lost her strong face. It always gets to me to see my mom cry. I wrote this for her.

Weary Flower

They’re all trapped by confusion,
They’ve been entombed in doubt.
And I’ve been caught by jaded vagrants,
Cannot find a safe path out.

I stumble on without a course,
Captain of the non-elite
Marching on the thorns of roses,
Brittle flowers mar my feet.

Blinded, I don’t see the blooming
Thorned flow’r that draws my blood.
Exhausted, I fall crying,
Down into the mud.

All my resolutions failing,
Quickly losing hope,
Who will break the noose I’ve made,
And help untie the rope?

Roses grow around me
As I lay there weak and sore.
At one time the was joy in me
I fear there is no more.

[Sinfael Vanmoriel]

Another well-done poem. Tastefully bleak, but again, you are exceptional with rhymes and the mood is well described. I hope your grandfather and mother have been doing better.

On the topic of your Christianity Essay, while I don't necessarily agree with all of the points, I do think it was very well written. (I read it to my husband, Matt, as well, and he thought it was great!) The humor is very well placed and helps to narrate the point without trivializing it. And I agree with you that "religion kills" is a very bad catchphrase for the philosophy it was meant to represent.

Also, we love your sense of humor in this house, so I often catch myself relaying the funny things that you say or write on occasion. I hope that doesn't strike you as weird!

Keep it up!

Edit: Up for a poetry challenge perhaps?

[Toumar]

Hey! So this thread has been dead for a while. Who's lazy? I'm lazy!

But! Tonight was a good night. I gave the message (a sort-of-sermon) at the praise and worship service for the band that I play in at my church. (I play bass, but since I haven't written anything for that, I'm not posting about it here)

The following essay is a pro-Christian message, from a Christian to Christians. I invite everyone and anyone to read it, but if you do not have an interest in religion or Christianity offends you in some way, I won't take it personally if you don't read it.

-----------------------------

It’s always struck me as odd that so many people refer to love as ‘the universal language’. Because while it’s certainly true that real love, what love is actually supposed to be, can be appreciated and shared by everyone, love is, in my opinion, one of the most often misrepresented and disagreed upon subjects in the world. Love is strength and support when one is weak, and yet the most common metaphor for feeling love is that of falling. Love ought to be a constant and steadfast part of every relationship (not just romantic ones), and yet it is most often treated as something to be made. But love is not a big hole in the ground, and love is not arts and crafts. Love is Christ.

A few weeks ago, I heard for the first time the song “Love is Not a Fight” by Warren Barfield. The last two lines of the chorus are “Love is not a fight, but it’s something worth fighting for.” These lines really caught my attention, and got me thinking. Those of you who know me know how dangerous that can be. I kept wondering to myself, “Is love really not a fight?” Something about hearing the line in the song made me shake my head, made me feel like I disagreed, but it took me just a little while to articulate why.

Like love, the word ‘fight’ can have very different significance depending on the context. In this case, it certainly doesn’t mean like a fist fight or a shouting match. A better synonym for fight, in this situation, is ‘struggle.’ Love is a contention against opposing forces, which is precisely how the dictionary defines the word struggle.

A lot of people might not see things this way at first. To too many, thanks to contemporary media, love is that feeling you get when everything is right with the world and you’re with that special someone, and nothing else matters. But when we look at Christ’s example, and a few New Testament passages that talk about what love is, we see something very different.

John 3:16 - “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

I pretty much had to include this verse. To me, it really sums up the central and most important element of Christianity. We are children of God, called to emulate his Son, and this passage reminds us of two very important things: God's will is determined by his unshakable love, and when he asks something of us, to show our love for him by giving something up, no sacrifice is too great.

Mark 12:33 - “...to love your neighbor as yourself is more important than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.”

Matthew 5:44 - But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you

As these passages show us, love isn’t just what Hollywood romances make it out to be. Certainly, romantic relationships would all fail were it not for love, but love is a crucial aspect of how we ought to interact with everyone.

It's easy to see, looking at it in this light, why Love can be a struggle. Look at love's adversaries: Selfishness. Greed. Lust. Laziness. Fear. These and plenty of others are elements of human nature that make us hesitant to show love, to live like Christ. It is human nature, and reinforced by secular American culture, to care for oneself, for one’s family and friends first, and to not worry too much about the rest. But to truly live a life for love, we cannot settle for that. After all, what is more Christ-like? To show love by being good to those that are good to you, or to show love to those that have yet to earn it?

I think the best way to show an example of this concept, of loving someone when they don't earn it, is to look back on a time in my life when I was the one not earning the love that others chose to show me anyway. When I was in middle school, I wasn't really a very cheerful person. I hated school, I wasn't really keen on being helpful around the house, and basically I wanted nothing to do with anything unless it was video games, food, or sleep. I still went to Youth Group regularly, but I was never too keen on the activities the leaders had planned, and pretty much only participated when asked directly – wasn't much of a volunteer.

My parents, Bob Smith, and all the other adults at this church still supported and loved me no matter how stubborn I got, no matter how impudent or selfish I was. It was a struggle for them, I'm sure, but thanks to them putting up with my attitude and trying to steer me right, I outgrew that bratty phase of my life and consider myself a much better person for their efforts.

We will always make mistakes. Sometimes our mistakes cause us to hurt each other. Some folks even choose to hurt others deliberately. It is not an easy thing, to respond to injustice, injury, and persecution with love. It's reflected in my own life. I know for a fact that I am not always able to do what's asked of me – I don't always show love to those that do not earn it.

But loving those that don't earn it is what grace is all about. It's what God is all about. Being above notions like “an eye for an eye”, that's why Jesus lived and loved and died. He loves us all, cares for us all, even though we fall short almost daily. And since I can't think of a better role model than that (the Fonz notwithstanding), that's how I'm striving to live my life.